One of my main passions is self development!

I believe that those who choose to actively acknowledge their issues and seek to improve their situations are the only ones who really succeed in life (makes sense?)

Self improvement is not for everyone though – there always has to be the whingers amongst us!

But somewhere, someday, somehow we all must take responsibility for ourselves and stand up and be counted! We must take responsibility to improve ourselves and make it a top priority in our lives!

Most people have had bad situations in their life or childhood that can make for a really good excuse, to not make the most out of life. I could easily list several things that have happened to me that would make for great reasons why I couldn’t possibly be successful – but I choose not to!

I choose to get on with it and be a success at everything I do! – You can too!
I will be posting my self improvement articles regularly – so check back often for a good read or make it easy on yourself and subscribe to the feed (you’ll find this under the comments bit!)

Today…….I want to start by exploring the unreal word that is – FAILURE!

Have you ever baulked on something because you were afraid of failure? I know I have in the past!As a matter of fact – most people have at some time in their life! I know it and you know it – no one likes to fail. Can anyone put their hand up and say they are happy to feel like they’re ineffective, inefficient, weak or lacking in any way? not me! thats for sure!

Think about this – failure doesn’t exist – not until YOU say it does, anyway! Get out your dictionary, and find numerous definitions of the word Failure. You will find some of these: a state of inability to perform a normal function adequately, a failing to do or perform, a lack of success, a fracturing or giving way under stress.

Check out these definitions – do you see what they have in common if you consider goal acheivement: failure is merely a PERCEPTION.

If you believe you have failed, then you most certainly have!
If you believe you don’t have the ability to succeed, then you don’t. and you won’t!
If you believe you can’t handle the pressure of achieving your goals, surely you wont reach them!
If you believe you’re not or can’t be successful, you’re not and you won’t be!
Failure only really exists in your own mind! The moment you decide to give up or stop working toward your goals, failure is born and it is real.

Lets say that you never do that though? You never say this sort of negative stuff and instead, you strive to reach your goals, bit by bit, baby step by baby step – there’s no failure then, is there?

This little snippet of info should be particularly encouraging if you’ve been working hard towards your goals but are not yet seeing many or any positive results yet. All you need to do is keep going and you cannot fail!
Now this is self improvement and self development at the roots!
Improve your mindset! – You CAN do it! You WILL do it! You ARE doing it!

Here are three tips to improve yourself and keep your mind strong and focused on your goals:

1) Never allow yourself an easy way out. Heaps of people do this without even knowing they are doing it! They are happy to work hard on their goals until the going gets too tough or its not as easy as they thought and then they give up. Don’t do that! Commit yourself to making your goals happen, no matter what! Never quit, never admit failure, never lose your determination.

2) Don’t set yourself up by putting unrealistic timeframes on your goals! It’s okay to set a general timeframe, but surely you have to know that circumstances are not always in your control (crap happens!) so you can’t be totally sure when your goal will actually be achieved. If you set a day or date that you must achieve your goal by, to feel that you have succeeded – you’re just setting yourself up for failure! Don’t do that!
Instead, get a general idea of when you’d like your goal to be completed, but then take it a day at a time and focus on making progress towards you goal, not on reaching the finish line in as little time as possible. (sensible? – I think so!)

3) Finally, are you one of these people that see obstacles and setbacks as failures?
The two are completely different. An obstacle, setback or delay means only one thing: it’s not time for your goal to be achieved yet. That’s it! It doesn’t mean you failed; it simply means you’re not done yet. You’ve got to keep moving forward and find a way around the problem.

Engaging in Self development strategies and Self improvementtechniques should be a daily mission for everybody who really wants to succeed in life.
My current way of improving myself on a daily basis is through Success University!

If you are looking for a new way to practice self improvement or self development strategies and make your life better – check out Success University and signup for a 14 day FREE Trial – I love it! (There is also a great income opportunity attached to Success University, if you are that way inclined!)

Dont forget to drop back often for the latest top tips, articles or affirmations on self development and self improvement and enjoy your day! – Kym

Increase your self development strategies by avoiding the fear of failure!

Self development is a huge subject but today I want to concentrate on how to avoid feeling the paralyzing fear of failure. It can be so bad that aside from holting work in progress, it even stops us from starting a project in the first place!

This fear can stop you in your tracks on the road to success, and also prevents us from living life to the full – as we all should!

So what’s going on here? Why do we develop a fear of failure? and why is it so paralyzing?

Fear of failure has often taken hold over a period of time and may have been triggered by a need for acceptance and approval from our loved ones and those who are most important to us.

When we are young, we need acceptance, but those of us who received little praise for our efforts or had constant criticism while growing up unfortunately learn that no matter how hard they try, it is never good enough. As a result, once you are an adult, potential projects can seem doomed before they are even started.

This lack of self esteem feeds itself, and lots of people become hesitant to even try anything new and in turn can become trapped in an dull and boring life.

Fortunately, you don’t have to stick to this thought pattern!
Anyone can overcome their fear of failure and feel success.
An excellent self development resource that I am currently benefiting greatly from is Success University!

The seven steps below make for a fantastic starting point in your journey of self development.

1. Can you recognize the difference between your own fear and an actual lack of real success?

Heaps of people can give a number of reasons for their current or longterm lack of success. But, if you analyze the situation critically and pinpoint when you decided you had supposedly failed, you may find that it was your own fear of failure that stopped you in the first place.

Setbacks and obstacles are a part of any success! When your fear of failure is bearing down upon you, these setbacks will show themselves as a reason not to continue. It is not actually the setback that sets you back – but your lack of self esteem and confidence.

Have a look back over your past endeavours and try to pinpoint the place at which you lost confidence. What were the thoughts that were running through your head? Once you are aware of the fact that it is your own fear that is stopping you, you may begin to make your way past it.

2. Recognize your giving up point.

When people experience the perception of failure, they can begin to become impatient and usually give up too soon to see success. When you expect failure, it can be really hard to consistently put in the effort to make a project work.

How much time and effort did you put into your failed projects? Did you get overwhelmed early on, and then decided to give up or that it wasn’t worth persisting?

3. C’mon……..give yourself a break!

When you find yourself feeling stressed early in a project, make sure you get yourself some time out. If you do not relieve stress and try to push yourself forward, it can only lead to more stress and negativity which will magnify your fear of failure. Relaxing and doing some fun stuff will refresh you and give you back an uplifted frame of mind.

Learn to recognise how much time you can hack working on a project before it gets to you! Then make sure you give yourself mini-breaks just before this time frame is up.

4. You eat an elephant one bite at a time – take baby steps

Instead of trying to complete a big project all in one go, break it down into baby steps! When you begin to feel overwhelmed, stop for your “time out” and then come back later when you’re feeling more refreshed. Once you get by the first task with success it will spru you on to taclke the next one.

5. Work on things that you know you are good at

When you do something that you are actually pretty good at, its easier to succeed. All these little successes will develop your confidence and self-esteem. Once you are on a roll, you can start to develop your skills in other area’s and build even more confidence. Success breeds more success.

Once you have gained more confidence like this, you can put more effort into the projects that usually trigger your fear of failure.

6. Boost your self-esteem

The root cause of fear of failure is usually low self esteem. When you improve your self esteem, your fear of failure will weaken. So, how do you improve your self esteem?

As I said above, self-esteem is often to do with negativity from times gone by. Once you begin to realize this, and that these events most probably had nothing to do with you (yes – even direct negative feedback – this usually has more to do with the people that give you this feedback rather than you, yourself), you can begin to see that you do not need to keep thinking of yourself in the same way and you will start realizing how detrimental this is to your own well being and mindset. Lookout for the the positives in yourself, and seek out and explore your own abilities. Dont worry about what others have to say and rely on yourself more – trust your own judgement.

7. Surround yourself with positive people and support

Friends and family are the obvious choice here, but in many cases these are not always the most positive people for you. If those who are close to you are in the habit of putting you down, this can re-kindle your low self esteem and fear of failure. Try to focus on those “true” friends who support you in every way.

You can also employ professional support such as a life coach or counsellor. If this is too expensive or just not your thing, there are many personal development books and online resources (such as Success University) that can help you get over your fear of failure and achieve success.

If you can follow these seven top tips to avoid feeling the fear of failure your journey in self development is happenening! You will be well on the way to a life of success and fulfilment.
You can enjoy a 14 day FREE Trial at Success University – I love it!