Typical Reasons for Choosing to Divorce

Some of the major reasons a couple decide to divorce are: 

• Finances
• Infidelity
• Lack of intimacy
• Abuse

Financial Strain

When it comes to finances, lack of money and constant financial strain can place a huge burden on a marriage and often times, one partner in the marriage decides divorce is the best option, perhaps going it alone would be easier financially.

Infidelity

If infidelity is the issue, it is sometimes something that a couple can work through and overcome.  It really does depend upon the individual’s concerned and how much they wish to remain married.  Coming back from infidelity is not an easy thing to do as the bond of trust has been broken and takes a substantial time to repair. There are some people who, when they chose to marry did so for other reasons such as status, wealth etc and not to be gender specific, these are generally women who when marrying, understand that in doing so, along with this arrangement comes infidelities that need to be overlooked.  We are all different I suppose, however it still comes down to a question of whether or not you wish to remain married.

Abuse

Abuse in any form in my personal opinion is just totally unacceptable.  I don’t care what the reason or the excuse it’s simply not on.  I would never ever recommend that a person being abused, whether it be male or female, verbal or physical abuse, that they stay in that marriage. My opinion is that the sooner the injured party divorces and moves on with their life the better.  There is simply no reason good enough to warrant staying in that situation.

Sometimes too, if we marry young we really don’t know our own mind.  Nor do we realize how much we will change and grow as an individual throughout our lives. Remaining married is in my opinion, one of the most difficult things to achieve in this life.  Sometimes people marry for security, believing their partner will fulfill all their needs and take responsibility for them. We cannot ever expect another person to do that for us, and need to understand this before marrying.

Of course there are times in a marriage where there are outside influences that are simply too much to bear, and too much for a marriage to overcome.

By MaryAnn Roche.

Should you divorce or try to work it out? 

The decision to divorce is never an easy one and requires much thought and contemplation. Susie and Otto Collins have a handy publication for those of you contemplating a divorce. This e-book is designed to help you in thinking through all issues prior to making a decision.  Appropriately titled “To Stay or Go” you can pick up a copy here.

I would suggest discussing your impending decision with a counselor and a Lawyer so that all aspects of deciding to divorce are clearly outlined to you and nothing is overlooked.

Although designed for women facing divorce, I can recommend the following publication “How to Win When Facing Divorce” – written by Barry Roche, a retired Australian Family Law Lawyer. Now living abroad, Barry writes about topics that can have a positive impact on the lives of everyday people.