Many Kinds Of Love

Over the ages, love as an emotion has been glorified in all manifestations of creative form be it literature, art, music, cinema etc. There are many kinds of love, be it parental love, sibling love, divine love, friendship, love for your pet or even love for the environment or the society at large, but the most talked about love form seems to be romantic love.

The love between a man and a woman is an overpowering emotion that transcends all age, cast, creed, religion or socio-economic barriers. Euphoric mood, restlessness, sleepless nights, butterflies in the stomach etc are just some of the signals that indicate when you have been bitten by the love bug. Mythological interpretations have epitomized love in the form of divinity like Cupid, Venus, Aphrodite, Eros etc and the various fables associated with them with regional and local anecdotes sprinkled in.

Romantic Love

When we ‘fall’ in love, we are drawn or attracted to a particular person depending on the various characteristics or features of the person be it physical attributes, intellectual compatibility, moral values, social or cultural preferences etc. Although a poet might eulogize love for its unpredictability and harp on eternal love that gets immortalized after death like Romeo and Juliet, scientists have a different take on it.

Science attributes different hormones and chemical secretions in our biological system responsible for our romantic link-ups. Researchers have suggested three broad stages of love namely lust, attraction and attachment and the different hormones that are activated during each stage. Whilst the lust stage is predominated by the two sex hormones testerone and oestrogen, adrenaline, dopamine and serotonin get active at the attraction stage where the love struck couples are completely besotted with each other. The attachment stage which signifies long-term relationships requires more commitment and stability and involves oxytocin and vasopressin.

With changing times, the dynamics of love have transformed drastically. The lofty concepts of eternal platonic love and commitment for life have given way to speed dating, internet dating, one-night stands and casual flings. Earlier the expression of love was subtle through romantic love letters or the pangs of unrequited love expressed through poetries and soulful music. But today’s fast-paced generation is more used to superficial and materialistic displays of feelings. It has become a fad to have multiple ‘break-ups’ and ‘moving on’ to greener pastures has never been easier. Love has become commercialized with Valentine’s Day, a whole day dedicated to love, with companies selling cards, florists, gift shops, restaurants etc raking in the moolah and cashing in on the occasion.

But that doesn’t mean that people have stopped falling in love. There are still instances of first crush on your school English teacher, butterflies fluttering in your stomach whilst sitting next to your first love at college or the deep bond or companionship that you cherish with your childhood sweetheart whom you eventually marry. Hopeless romantics and dedicated lovers are still very much a reality and they woo their lovers passionately, sacrificing when required and going all out for their loved ones.

So it is judicious to rid yourself of all pre-conceived notions of love when you begin a new relationship. Listen to your heart and be guided by it. Allow yourself to experience the glorious feeling of love that will brighten up your life and add joy and happiness to it.

By MaryAnn Roche.