Being in a new place or with new people can be intimidating. When placed in such a situation it becomes imperative to form new relations, because humans are social beings. W e have the capability to judge, form opinions, build relations and express emotions. Relations are the fabric of our social skills; and the crucial component helping us form relations is the impressions and opinions we form of the people we interact with. So it becomes essential for us to positively contribute to portraying a good and lasting impression to build good relations. Depending on your need and type of relationship you are trying to form, here are a few tips you can follow:

Look and Feel Confident – Being confident will convey to the people around you a positive attitude and behavior. Also, when you are confident about yourself you can interact better with people.

Don’t overdo or over talk – Be friendly and approachable, but don’t overdo your enthusiasm. When you are in a new place or meeting new people, and would like to make new friends your friendliness is what will propel your efforts in the right direction. At the same time being over friendly or over involving will steer people away. While having a conversation pick safe subjects and try not to make any controversial remarks. (You can save all those for your close friends, who don’t mind and won’t judge what you say)

Address the person with their Name – I know people tend to forget names, especially if they have met briefly. When you are introduced to someone, attach a cue with the name to help you remember. The next time you see the person, you can address the person with their name. This shows attentiveness and personalizing.

Dress well – Dressing well doesn’t imply wearing any elaborate or expensive stuff. Make a conscious effort to dress for the occasion. Being well dressed will not only make you look and feel good, but will also tell others that you have put in the thought and effort for the way you look. As the adage goes, ‘First impressions are last impressions’. This may seem shallow and there are some who deny this, but in the real world how you present yourself tells a lot about you.

Be Positive – Last but not the least, radiating positive energy is the key to attracting positive relations. So, smile your way through new beginnings.

By,
Mary-Ann Roche

Self control is a person’s ability to control emotions, desires and actions. It is the ability to separate the feelings from the self. When you let your feelings become you, your actions and decision making capabilities become hindered. You may end up reacting based on your feelings and not acting according to the situation. It takes a lot of practice and effort to gain control over your feelings. But all that effort and practice will pay off in the long run and pave the way for your success in leading a balanced life.
Needs and desires are completely different things. There are times when desires become so strong that they transform into needs. Self control will keep those desires under control. Think of your favorite food, or even better bring it home and don’t eat it yet. As a first step to self control set your mind that you will not eat that food for ‘x’ number of days. I know, this sounds kind of ridiculous, but trust me it works. Abstaining from something that you really crave for will develop resistance to impulses and desires in you. When you can resist temptation you have gained control over your desires.
All our actions are defined by our emotions. Emotions are the most difficult to control, but if you can gain that control over your emotions you have mastered self control. Emotions could be anything ranging from anger, happiness, sorrow, frustration, etc. Out of all these the biggest step towards greater self control is controlling anger and frustration. Anger overpowers your mind and senses; you may do or say something that you will regret later. Anger is self-destructive and you don’t want to walk that path. When any person or situation makes you angry, try this: Count till 3 before you react or divert your attention to anything that will give the required pause before reacting. This pause will mellow down your anger and as you keep practicing you will eventually gain complete control over your temper.
Meditation is one of the best methods to gain self control and balance your body and mind. Meditation helps unclutter your mind of unwanted thoughts and emotions and also helps you focus and de-stress. Having a calm and clear mind enables you to control your feelings and in turn your actions.

By,
Mary-Ann Roche

“Every being is only your self multiplied”- Swami Vivekananda. This is one of many quotes of Swami Vivekananda, which summarizes self realization. Swami Vivekananda was one of India’s greatest philosophers, who travelled all over the world giving sermons about various topics, from life to spirituality. There are various such philosophers teaching us and showing the way to self enlightenment and helping us deal with the daily challenges of life.

We live in a fast paced, changing and stress-filled world. In combating the daily challenges of life, we tend to not realize our true selves and digress from our path to the divine. We need to de-stress and regain our energies lost and bring in harmony into our lives to be enlightened of our true self. Self Enlightenment is the path in the realization of our oneness with the divine.

To put our thoughts into spiritual direction we need to recognize the world as a divine world based on cosmos, and not a world based on chaos or chance. Our society which is composed of various degrees of intelligence and capacity and personality, does not grasp the full significance of the discovery of self enlightenment. We need to discover a new set of values for the terms liberty, law and love (moksa, dharma and kama), which are impossible to get in the purely political and materialistic society. The social life of man becomes transfigured and civilized by the sublimated direction given to all activities through this discovery. There are various forms of teachings and practices which are directed to the civilizing of man, by taming his lower nature which revels in egoism and competition, jealousy and greed, violence and hatred.

One of the paths defined is the four fold Yoga path of Raja Yoga, Karma Yoga, Jnana Yoga and Bhakti Yoga. Raja Yoga consists of teachings for the purification of Thoughts, Karma Yoga contains teachings for the purification of Actions, Jnana Yoga is the teachings leading to the path of knowledge and wisdom and Bhakti Yoga is the path to the ultimate realization of the self, through worship and meditation, leading to a higher state of consciousness or enlightenment.

The moral and intellectual education combined with spiritual thoughts will help us conquer our internal nature and control over the senses (indriyas). Learning these elements and following the path to the divine will lead to self enlightenment and help us be better individuals and create a positive influence on our society.

By
Mary-Ann Roche

It really does pay to  take care of your mind and body as you grow older. To make this decision to care for yourself will enable you to slow the aging process down somewhat and also allow you to enjoy your older years, maintaining overall fitness and an active brain.

When you take care of yourself, it slows the aging process and you can stay fit and alert well into your senior years.

The major areas to focus on to maintain  optimum health are diet, exercise and activity that keeps your brain active. When you pay attention to these key health elements, you can help yourself to stay young and slow down the aging process.

Here are some excellent anti-aging techniques for you to try daily:

1. Take antioxidants as they are vital to your health. They reduce free radicals that are known to contribute to common diseases in aging individuals.
  Note that fresh fruit and vegetables are an excellent source of antioxidants.  Including a daily vitamin is also important.

2. Exercise and strength training. Exercise keeps your body strong and helps fight off any infection and stops the body from breaking down. Not only will you feel better, but you’ll also get a lot healthier at the same time!

Exercise provides:

* Increased stamina
* Greater muscle strength
* Better balance
* Clarity in thinking
* A stronger immune system

3. Stay alert and sharp. You can keep your brain sharp by being constantly aware of your surroundings. This sounds rather simple, but how often do we let loose and daydream, instead of focusing on the present? When you stay alert, you’re fully present in the moment and you’re better able to make quick and accurate decisions.  Undertake activities such as puzzles and crosswords that help keep your brain active.

4. Try to constantly learn new things. Remember your brain need constant stimulation. You can easily avoid this by keeping your brain active via constant learning and reading.

* A simple tip is to vary your routines and strive to learn something new each day.

5. Challenge yourself. It always helps to use the problem solving portions of your brain. These skills need to be utilized and if they aren’t, will fade over time.  Puzzles and games are a great way to keep your brain active.

6. Don’t stress over health issues. You see statistics everywhere about certain health conditions that are more likely to affect you as you age. Of course it is important to be aware and to always  be checked by your physician, but don’t waste your precious time worrying about an illness you may never get.
* Ease your stress by taking action to strengthen your health instead of worrying.

7. Get an adequate amount of sleep. Getting enough sleep at night is very important for maintaining good health. 6-8 hours every night is the number you should be working toward. Your body and mind need that time to recoup, and you may be more susceptible to stress or disease without it.

8. Avoid smoking and drinking alcohol. Smoking is a guaranteed way of putting your health at risk and not only that, but it ages your skin and the rest of your body. The harsh reality is that you are shortening your lifespan if you choose to smoke. If you do smoke, then I would strongly suggest breaking this habit as soon as possible. When it comes to alcohol, small amounts here and there won’t cause much harm, but drinking can be a slippery slope into disease if you abuse it.

9. Look after your skin.  I cannot stress this enough, you must moisturize and moisturize and stay out of the sun.  The sun quite simply will age and damage your skin, quicker than anything.  Be sure to establish a daily skin care routine and try beneficial anti-aging gels and creams.

10. Reduce grains and sugar in your diet. A diet rich in fruits and vegetables maintains good health and keeps your calorie intake at an acceptable level. Remember, carbohydrates are necessary for your nutrition, but is eaten in excess they contribute to increasing your insulin levels and speeding up the aging process.

If you include these strategies every day, you’ll notice a big difference in the way you look and feel. Getting older doesn’t have to be synonymous with deterioration. Begin right now to take care of your body and mind and it will serve you well in your later years.

By

MaryAnn Roche

How You Can Command the Respect of Others

Do you ever get the feeling that your first name should be Doormat?
Would you like to be able to command the respect of others?
Do you feel as if people take advantage of you on a daily basis? Are you allowing this to happen?

Learn about You and Get What You Need – Click Here!
If you responded yes to one or all of these important questions, it’s obvious that you don’t have the respect of others, but that’s why you’re here to learn!

Respect is something you earn. However, no one deserves to be taken advantage of. Fortunately, it’s possible to change how others treat you!

Implement these simple tips and tricks and you’ll command the respect of others you deserve in no time:

1. Live by the Golden Rule.

Most of us are familiar with the Golden Rule. “Do unto others as you would want done to you” is a wonderful philosophy when attempting to garner respect. Always treat others as you expect to be treated. People will tend to reciprocate and treat you the same way. If they don’t, then you can ease your way out of the relationships over time, if possible.

2. Put yourself first.

An example of this would be telling your friend that you cannot babysit her 4-year old so she can get her nails done because you’re busy with your own personal appointments and schedule.

Find the Real You, Meet Your Higher Self – Click Here!

* You have to make yourself a priority. If people see that you respect yourself, then you’ll ultimately be respected, too.

3. Use strong body language.

When speaking face to face with others, portray the fact that you’re strong and important. Stand straight, look people in the eye, and speak forcefully but not overwhelmingly so.

* If your body language shouts, “I am important and I respect myself,” you’ll surely gain the respect of others.

* Those people who stare at the floor when speaking, avoid eye contact, and whisper their words are telling others that they don’t believe they deserve respect and attention. Always remember to stand tall and proud; you’re important and you deserve to be recognized!

4. Speak positively.

In addition to having strong body language, the words you use to express yourself are also extremely important when trying to earn the respect of others. Learn to speak in positively and authoritatively. Don’t be boastful, but don’t demean or belittle yourself either.

* Leave the impression that you’re intelligent, well spoken and confident. If you portray yourself in this manner others will treat you the same way.

5. Surround yourself with the right people.

Let’s face it: there are people in this world who are disrespectful to everyone and everything. No matter what you do to command respect, nothing may work!
Learn about You and Get What You Need – Click Here!

* You may need to take some time and rethink those you’re spending time with. They may not be the kind of people who have your best interests at heart.

6. Stand up for yourself.

If people are disrespectful to you, how do you respond? Do you say something to the offending person or do you just go on with life? People treat us in the way we allow ourselves to be treated.

* If you confront the person and voice your opinion and unhappiness, chances are good that person won’t treat you that same way in the future. It’s not about being confrontational, but a simple “I don’t appreciate how you’re speaking to me” can go a long way.

Final thoughts on getting the Respect you Deserve

We all have a desire and need for respect. By making some small changes, you’ll be able to open yourself to receiving the respect of others, while learning how to also express your respect. Use these techniques in all interactions every day to command the respect of others and gain the respect you deserve.

By MaryAnn Roche.